


The Start of A Long Road

by szm



Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Gen, Implied Relationships, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-09-25 22:01:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9847949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/szm/pseuds/szm
Summary: Foggy and the Defenders. But really it's all about Foggy and Matt. Because when isn't it?





	1. The Start of a Long Road

Foggy honestly feels like everyone else is playing to a different set of rules that he is sure he could understand if someone would just explain the basics to him. But nothing makes sense. He knows he’s a good lawyer. He’s been at HCB for a little over a year now, bad lawyers don’t last that long. He thinks he’s (mostly) a good person. He tries to be anyway. But somehow this kind of thing always finds him.

It’s his office Jessica Jones bursts into at 5.08pm one Friday afternoon, Matt Murdock and a blonde Foggy doesn’t know in tow. Daryl, one of the security officers, trailing behind them. He had a hand clutching Jones’ arm. But it doesn’t seem like she’s even noticed. Foggy felt bad for Daryl, who is just the nicest guy, but he’s 6’2 with more muscles than a mere mortal should be allowed. Foggy can’t imagine he usually has this much trouble getting people to notice when he’s trying to kick them out. 

“It’s alright,” Foggy said to him with a sigh, standing but staying behind the ‘safety’ of the desk. “I’ll take a meeting with Miss Jones and her… friends.” He doesn’t glance at Matt when he says it. He absolutely doesn’t. They don’t talk much these days, Foggy hardly even sees him. He has no desire to check up on the man who was his best friend. Matt looks thinner, maybe. Carrying himself like he’s tired, or hungover. If he’s been spending time with Jones it could easily been the second one. Foggy will cheerfully admit to drinking his fair share but hardly anyone puts cheap liquor away like Jones.

“If you’re sure, Mr Nelson?” asked Daryl, like he certainly isn’t sure, eyeing up Jones who was shouting at the blonde. Foggy caught the words ‘reckless’ and ‘going to get killed’ in her hissed ranting.

“Go on,” said Foggy kindly. “It’s gotta be clocking off time for you soon, right? And it’s Suzie’s play tonight? I’ll be fine. Miss Jones is a valued client. I’ll look after her.”

Daryl smiled and nodded, leaving the circus with Foggy. Foggy is just impressed that he didn’t choke on ‘valued client’. No-one knows what Jones has on Jeri Hogarth, but it sure as hell must be good. Anyone else who inspires Jeri’s forehead vein to throb like that is usually never heard of again. But Jones is to be treated like a top client, although as far as Foggy can work out she doesn’t pay beyond serving the odd court document and finding the occasional missing witness. Foggy was handed her file three weeks in. Mostly because she had reduced the last underling Jeri had tried to palm her off onto to tears. 

Foggy really liked her.

“You’ll get killed!” Jones screamed at the blonde just as the door closed on a rapidly retreating Daryl. There was a shocked silence that dropped over the group. “And I don’t… Trish, I can’t…” Jones shook her head. She wasn’t crying, because of course she wasn’t, but Foggy thought it would probably be less awkward than the not-crying that was happening all over her face right now. “Fuck it,” said Jones on a breathy exhale. She stalked round Foggy’s desk and pulled open the bottom drawer. When she found it empty she glared holes in the side of Foggy’s head. “You moved your booze?” she asked fake sweetness over a fake threat.

“Trying to cut down,” lied Foggy. “To what do I owe this delightful surprise?” he gestured to Matt. “Are you considering a change in legal representation?”

Jones snorted. And Matt replied. “I am just here as a friend, Foggy… I might be a bit involved.” That stupid half-smile he always used when he knew he was in trouble but he didn’t think it was very serious. 

Foggy _did not_ find it charming.

“Like you’re not exactly where she got the idea from, _Daredevil_ ,” sneered Jones.

“Jess!” exclaimed the blonde (Foggy guessed that was ‘Trish’) flicking her eyes from Foggy to Matt.

“He already knows,” said Jones, rolling her eyes. “He’s the ex.”

“Law partner,” interrupted Foggy not looking a Matt. “Ex law partner. Foggy Nelson. Formally of Nelson and Murdock.” He stepped around the desk, holding out a hand to Trish. “Pleased to meet you, Ms?”

Jones slumped in Foggy’s chair. She leaned both elbows on the desk. “Oh I’m sorry let me introduce you. Foggy Nelson, meet Hellcat. _Hellcat_ meet the guy who hopefully can keep your ass out of jail. If you don’t get yourself killed that is.”

“Trish Walker,” said Trish firmly, shaking Foggy’s hand. “A grown woman capable of making her own decisions and not in need of babysitting.” She was somehow smiling at Foggy and simultaneously glaring at Jones.

“I’ll bet,” said Foggy smiling back. “And Matt?”

“Oh they are just great buddies!” said Jones sarcastically. “They go superhero shopping together. Swap tips on how to get blood out of spandex, all that good stuff.”

“Some training, and I got her some better armour. She’s a good fighter, and it’s not like I can tell her she should stop,” said Matt, staring intently into the space above Foggy’s left shoulder.

“Right, wouldn’t want to be a _hypocritical_ lawyer-slash-vigilante,” said Foggy slowly.

Matt sighed, “I’m sorry Foggy, we shouldn’t have burst in on you like this.”

“No,” agreed Foggy. “Nice to meet you Ms Walker. I enjoy your radio show.” He walked to the bookcase on the other side of the office behind Matt. It was mostly for show. He pulled out a half full Whiskey bottle than had been hidden behind a fake book and tossed it to Jones. “There. I hid it because, honestly? You drink too much, and that’s _me_ saying that. But what the hell right? You’re a grown woman and you know all the risks. God forbid I be _hypocritical_ about it. Apparently we should all support each other in our self-destructive behaviours.”

“Foggy…” Matt started to say, but Foggy spoke over him as Jones unscrewed the bottle and took a swig.

“Have you found her face down in her own blood yet?” he asked keeping his tone pleasant. “Because that sucks. Never did work out if that was better or worse than when he,” he jerked his thumb at Matt, “just didn’t answer his phone and bombs were going off and I _didn’t know_. Then there was that time I had to go find him when he was passed out on the roof with the massive head injury. Make friends with a good nurse, right Matty?” Foggy turned to Trish. “Also, I know it’s kinda a petty concern but there’s always the fear about what will happen when everyone finds out. I mean your career will be ruined. Prison time, for sure. If you’re lucky just you, you won’t be dragging friends and family with you. Hopefully I might be able to convince a court that Jessica just didn’t know and she won’t lose her PI license. But hey, it’s your life right? And the city needs heroes, or maybe just the blood. Gotta give up your share. Surely there is absolutely nothing else a media figure like you could do to help. This is absolutely worth your life.”

“Foggy that’s enough,” snapped Matt. 

Foggy looked around, both women were staring at him. Colour drained out of their faces. Foggy scrubbed a hand over his face. “Sorry, it’s been a long day. Ms Walker if you ever need a lawyer, call me. Please. Jessica has my numbers. Jess, you just ring me, whenever you need too. I get it. But right now if you could all get the hell out of my office?”

They left, Matt looking heartbroken, Trish looking shaken and Jones hitting him too hard on the shoulder on her way past. Taking the bottle with her. Foggy felt shaky and a little sick. He sat heavily at the desk and dropped his head into his hands. 

Because this was really his life right now.

**

He was actually surprised to find Daredevil in his apartment when he got home. Probably shouldn’t have been. Matt pulled the mask off. In the costume without the mask he looked younger somehow. More vulnerable. Foggy was still angry. This low level anger that had been bubbling away in him underneath everything for the last year. It wasn’t all at Matt, but it was nearly all _about_ Matt, in one way or another. 

“Are you okay?” asked Matt and Foggy couldn’t help the laugh that spilled out of his mouth.

“That’s my line,” said Foggy.

Matt half-smirked at the space to the left of Foggy’s head. “That’s not an answer.”

“No, it’s not,” confirmed Foggy. “So was that visit to my office your idea?”

“Jessica came up with it,” said Matt with a shrug.

“You let her think she did I’m sure. No-one _tells_ Jessica Jones what to do. But in the end I bet it was your idea,” insisted Foggy. “You knew what I’d say.”

“Trish should know the risks, all of them. You probably understand them better than the rest of us, and you could always make a good argument,” said Matt, his attempted joke falling flat. His expression softened, and he dropped his head slightly. “I had… she has… a lot to lose.”

“Would it have made a difference to you?” asked Foggy, he meant it to sound accusing but he just sounded lost. “If you’d known…”

“Maybe,” said Matt cutting Foggy off. “I think sometimes it would have, then other times I know it wouldn’t.” He screwed up his face in frustration. “You don’t… I don’t know how to explain it. To make you understand.”

“Well, you don’t have to anymore, do you?” said Foggy. He couldn’t look at Matt anymore so he dropped his gaze to the floor in front of him instead. 

Foggy glanced back up, Matt looked like he wanted to say something. But he shook his head instead. “I guess not,” he said quietly. Then the mask was back on and he was gone. 

**

Turns out kidnapping the lawyer of a high percentage of the city’s super-powered vigilantes is a bad idea. Who knew? Foggy had barely been manhandled into the stinky warehouse before Luke Cage came crashing in. Through a wall. Iron Fist close behind. Foggy wasn’t sure where Jones came from but she sent one thug crashing into the wall next to Foggy as Daredevil sailed in through a window. The fight didn’t last long. Most of the bad guys ran away, two were unconscious and Luke wrapped a metal bar round their wrists. They weren’t going anywhere when they woke up.

Iron Fist helped Foggy up and untied his hands. “There you go citizen!” He grinned at Foggy and Foggy couldn’t help but grin back. 

“Thank you strange masked man!” he responded matching Danny’s tone.

“What are you doing here” demanded Daredevil pacing over to where Foggy and Danny were.

“I was kidnapped,” said Foggy. “They weren’t very chatty so I didn’t catch why.”

“You should be more careful,” growled Daredevil.

“Hey,” said Jessica, “he’s fine. We can find out who wanted him from Dumb and Dumber over there. Chill out.”

“He chose to get out of this life,” Daredevil snapped back at Jessica. “ _He_ shouldn’t be here. He left so he didn’t have to be… involved in all this.”

“You pushed me away!” shouted Foggy, ignoring the stares of the other vigilantes in the room.

“Well it’s not like you went very far!” countered Daredevil just as loudly. “You were supposed to stay safe. But you’re everywhere. Bailing out Jess…”

“I work for HBC,” said Foggy crossing his arms and staring Daredevil down. “Jeri would literally have my balls if anything happened to Jones.”

“You’re the one who got Luke released…” continued Daredevil like Foggy hadn’t spoken.

“I owed Claire, from when she kept you alive after that time, I’m sorry _one of those times_ you nearly got your stupid ass _killed_ …”

“And,” continued Matt ignoring him. “You’re drinking buddies with Danny Rand. Is it any wonder the wrong kind of people are gunning for you?”

“Since when was I the kind of person who cared what ‘the wrong sort of people’ think? I’m allowed to have _friends_ Matt! And you know what, yes, they are my friends. You don’t get to call dibs. In fact I knew most of them before you did! I am apparently some kind of reckless idiot magnet.”

“Wow,” said Danny softly to Luke. “Secret identities mean nothing any more do they?”

“Because secret identities are dumb,” Luke replied with a smile, tugging at Danny’s mask. He turned to Jess. “I guess they know each other?”

Jessica shrugged “Ex’s”

“Law partners,” shouted Foggy without taking his eyes off Matt. “Ex-law partners.”

“Because Foggy couldn’t cope with Daredevil anymore,” said Matt stepping into Foggy’s space. “But somehow everything you guys do is fine. Literally and legally defensible. Worth the risks and the moral grey areas. You, he can be friends with. He’s just anti-Daredevil.”

“I wasn’t mad at you for _Daredevil_ , moron! I was _scared_ for you, worried that this stupid mask would swallow you up, get you killed. Or you’d do something… something that you wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself for. I was _mad_ because Matt Murdock let me down. Because you were the one person I trusted that much and you…” Foggy stopped suddenly and closed his eyes, breathing heavily and god knows what his heartbeat was telling Matt. “I can’t do this again.”

As he turned to leave Foggy felt something, Matt’s hand, brush his arm but it was pulled away. As he walked out of the warehouse he heard Jessica’s voice guff and stern. “Hey, if he wants to leave you let him go.” 

**

Foggy got two blocks before he had to admit he didn’t know where he was. Still in the city, but outside Hell’s Kitchen. Plus it was dark, the landmarks were different in the deeper shadows. 

“Alright,” he called out to the dark. “Whichever one of you followed me I could use some help. Unless you’re Matt.”

Iron Fist melted out of the shadows. Danny Rand smiled at him. “Lost?” he asked innocently.

“Well you’d know about lost,” Foggy joked back but he knew his smile fell flat. 

They walked for a little way in silence. “This is the longest I’ve ever known you to be quiet for,” remarked Danny lightly.

Foggy snorted. “I can see you side-eyeing me through that mask you know.” 

“Law partners, huh?” asked Danny a few steps later.

Foggy sighed. “I really am not in the mood to explain me and Matt right now.”

Danny grinned at him. “You’ll work it out Nelson. You’re pretty smart. For a lawyer.”

Foggy chuckled despite his dark mood. “I hope so, cus I can’t seem to leave him behind. Even if that’s what he wants me to do.”

“That didn’t look to me like what he wanted,” said Danny conversationally. “But maybe it would help more if you worked out what you wanted.”

Foggy tipped his head to the side to give Danny a sad smile. “Is this the kind of wisdom you learn at the Hogwarts for scary kung fu people?”

“Nah,” said Danny. “Oprah.”

**

Jessica left after Danny. Saying she was looking for a bar. Luke’s breathing changed, like he wanted to say something to her but he didn’t. After Jess was gone he clapped Matt on the shoulder, his amour absorbed some of the force but Matt could still feel it shudder through his bones.

“Nelson’s a good guy, but I tell you ‘Devil’ no-one is perfect. No matter how much you love them. You’ll have to forgive him if you want him back,” said Luke gently. Luke was always so gentle, Matt never quite knew how to deal with that.

Matt shook his head. “He’s the one who needs to forgive me.”

Luke chuckled, warm and deep. “Right, because you’re not blaming him for anything. Police’ll be here soon. See you round Daredevil.”

Then Luke was gone, and Matt could hear the sirens on their way.


	2. On the Road Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Actions, consequences, friendships and bad guys...

When Foggy got to work on Monday morning Jones was already there. Sat behind his desk with her feet (dirty boots and everything) propped up on his desk. He’d never tell her but it always cheered him up watching Jess treat the fancy office like this. Made it a real place, like maybe Foggy could really work here and he wasn’t just squatting until someone figured out he didn’t belong.

“Good morning Miss Jones, to what do I owe this honour,” he said brightly. He hadn’t seen Jess since the kidnapping the week before. She looked hungover and like she hadn’t slept in days. Completely normal, for Jess.

“Got you a present,” she said reaching into her backpack on the floor and pulling out a bottle. She put it on the desk and Foggy picked it up and peered at the label. It was in a language he didn’t know. Russian, Polish, something like that.

“Ah,” said Foggy. “The very best in alcohol that will make you blind! Jones you shouldn’t have. Why an excellent vintage no doubt.” Foggy grinned at her.

“Yeah, last week,” she retorted. Jones did the lip twitch thing that meant she was trying not to smile. Foggy awarded himself half a point in his ongoing internal game of ‘Jessica Jones deserves to be happy dammit’. “I’ve got 3 bits of shitty news, so get a glass and take a seat.”

“I’ll pass on the drink, no alcoholism before 10am, that’s my new motto,” said Foggy moving round the desk. “And you’re in my chair.” He raised his eyebrow at her. “Years of law school to get the good chair.”

Jones rolled her eyes and stood up, gesturing for Foggy to sit down with a deep, and deeply sarcastic, bow. Foggy nodded at her with a smirk and made a show of sitting down and getting comfortable. Jess just rolled her eyes and hopped up to sit crossed legged on the desk. “Number one,” she started without any preamble. “Trish has decided to plough ahead with the ‘Hellcat’ thing.”

“Jesus, I’m sorry,” said Foggy and he meant it.

Jones shrugged. “She’s gonna put you on retainer, if that’s okay? I made her promise me. If it’s any consolation, unlike the rest of us poor slobs she can pay you.”

“Of course it’s okay,” said Foggy trying to smile reassuringly. “And hey, Danny Rand can afford to pay too.”

“Yeah,” said Jones taking a swig from her flask. “Which is why he’s Hogarth’s client not yours. Number two. We found out who sent the world’s worst kidnappers after you.”

“Let me guess,” said Foggy letting her change the subject without comment. “Not the Easter Bunny.”

“A guy called Sheldon Garbett, who works for a guy, who works for another guy, who probably works for Wilson Fisk,” Jones looked right at him when she said it. Foggy felt his whole body freeze at the mention of Fisk. Fisk was locked up, Foggy wasn’t stupid, he knew criminals could and did operate criminal empires from inside prison. But they’d _won_ Matt did his hero thing and metaphorically slayed that particular dragon, right?

“Number three?” asked Foggy, hoping his voice didn’t betray how shaken he felt. 

“Number three, Murdock has not taken this news well. He tried to take on Garbett’s operation single handed. Turned out it was bigger than we thought, and ready for him. Had some kind of weird sound generator, like a dog whistle. It messed with his senses.” Foggy must have looked worried because Jones waved a hand at him. “He’s okay, Danny was in the area and came to help in the nick of time. Right now Luke is sitting on him so he can’t run off and do something else stupid. But you need to come talk to him. He’s not listening to anyone else. Not even Claire.”

“Hence my ‘present’,” said Foggy with a sigh.

“I thought you would probably need it.”

**

Foggy told his secretary to re-schedule his appointments for the day and followed Jones to her office/apartment. He tried not to think about Fisk, sitting in a prison cell somewhere plotting some kind of unlikely and elaborate revenge. As they headed down the corridor towards Jones’ door it opened. Matt (thankfully dressed as a person not a devil) was stood on the threshold glaring in their general direction. 

“I told you not to tell him!” announced Matt. “He needs to _stay away_ from all this.”

Jones ignored him and pushed past into her office. Foggy stopped at stared at Matt.

“You have a bruise,” he stated to Matt flatly. “And a cut over your eye. It looks nasty.” 

“It’s fine,” said Matt dismissively. “Don’t worry.”

There was the usual bright flare of rage, ‘don’t worry’ like it was that simple. Like it was something Foggy could just switch off. Foggy took a deep breath. “Fine,” he snapped. “Are you going to let me in?” 

Matt’s expression turn mulish, like he was going to say no, but then he sighed and moved to the side, Foggy moved past him and Matt’s palm brushed past his elbow, like Matt was going to hold on. But then Foggy moved out of range and the moment, if there ever had been one and Foggy wasn’t imagining it, passed. 

“He’s also got at least cracked ribs, if not broken, nasty bruising all over his torso, and a three inch gash on his right thigh. Not to mention he’s still suffering the after effects of whatever that crazy noise generator was,” said Claire as she walking into the room from the kitchen. “Hey Foggy.”

“Hey,” said Foggy with a smile. 

Matt was frowning leant up against the wall next to the door, Jess was leaning on her desk, deliberately not looking at Luke who was sat on Jones’ ratty couch reading a book. Claire perched herself on the arm on the couch next to him. “I’m _fine_ ,” said Matt in the face of all the evidence.

“Right,” said Foggy. “And we’re not worried at all that the bad guys seemed to know exactly how to neutralise you, or that they apparently work for Fisk?”

“It doesn’t matter,” said Matt. “They came after you. Fisk came after you.”

“Yeah,” said Foggy ducking his head to rub the back of his neck. “We probably should have seen that coming.”

Matt looked up in Foggy’s direction. “Why? What makes you say that?”

Foggy and Matt might not be the friends that they used to be but Foggy still knew Matt’s guilty face. “Because I helped put him behind bars? What else would there be? Matt? What are you not telling us?”

“You didn’t need to know any of this, Jess shouldn’t have told you,” said Matt voice low and hard. “I was taking care of it. I can fix it.”

“Fix it?” asked Jones suspiciously. “Why what did you break?”

“Taking care of what?” asked Foggy at the same time. “Getting yourself killed?”

“Right,” said Claire overly-bright. “Well, I’m done here.”

“I’ll walk you out,” said Luke quickly and the two of them left.

Matt sighed. “I talked to Fisk, after you got shot at the court house. I wanted information. How he got Frank Castle out of prison. I threatened him with the only thing he cared about. The only thing I could threaten him with.”

“His girlfriend, you threatened to get her visa pulled?” asked Foggy, Matt’s face answered the question for him. “That’s you, going with the smartest dumb move. You pissed him off, huh?”

“Fisk is practically running the prison from inside. He… proved that to me. He threatened you, _you_ Foggy. By name. We were falling apart anyway. I thought if I could keep you away from me I could direct his anger away from you.”

“Towards you,” said Foggy fear and anger fighting for dominance in his tone. “Because that’s somehow _better_? And this decision, you made _by yourself_? Because, why Matt? Because I’m just some kind of child you need to look after? I don’t… what the hell?”

“It doesn’t matter?” said Jones. “Plan is still the same. We need to find Garbett, find out how much he knows about Daredevil. Danny’s out looking for him now.” She addressed the last part to Foggy.

Foggy nodded, turning back to Jess because talking to Matt was too hard right now. “I’ll call Karen. See what she can find out.”

“You can’t,” said Matt.

“Matt, I swear to god…” started Foggy, he had a good rant bubbling up inside him. 

“No,” interrupted Matt. “You can’t, she’s gone for a month, research or something.”

“Oh right,” said Foggy righteous anger deflated. He did know that, he’d just forgotten in the moment. “Yeah.”

“I don’t want you, any of you, to get hurt Foggy. This is my problem.” Matt had his best kicked puppy face on, the cut and bruising only making it more effective. Foggy wanted to hug him and strangle him pretty much in equal measure.

“So,” said Jones, rolling her eyes. “We all want each other to be safe, which is nice. I guess. Murdock don’t be an asshole, okay? Let us help. I can charge you if it makes you feel better?”

Luke came back in, “I miss anything?”

“I’m heading back to work,” said Foggy. “I’ll see what I can dig up on Garbett.”

Matt opened his mouth to speak but closed it again, he didn’t look happy. “I’ve got some people I can talk to.”

“Matt, you’re still recovering,” Foggy reminded him sharply.

“So, I’ll go with him,” said Jones with a shrug.

Matt shook his head. “I’ll be better on my own.”

“Of course you will,” muttered Foggy.

“Of for fu…!” exclaimed Jess. “Fine, how about Murdock agrees to let me go with him. Like I wouldn’t be following him anyway. If Nelson agrees to let Luke go with _him_ , like Luke wasn’t going to go sit outside your offices anyway. Because _if_ this has anything to do with Fisk you two are the most likely targets. Does that work for everyone? Oh, that’s right, I don’t care!”

Matt still looked unhappy but nodded, Foggy gave Jess a half smile and left with Luke. One of the things about Luke was he wasn’t chatty, and for once Foggy didn’t feel like filling the quiet himself. The trip back to HCB gave him far too much time to think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Argh, this story is me just trying to get back into writing again so please bear with me a little. 
> 
> I sent Karen away, just because the character count was getting a bit high for me. She's off doing Punisher related things, probably.


	3. How Many Roads Must A Man (Or Woman) Walk Down?

Jess got a text from Danny, he’d tracked Garbett down to an office block. He was staking it out from a coffee shop across the street. Matt decided Jess probably rolled her eyes at Danny’s word choice based on the tone she read the text in. 

When they got there Danny was sat in the window drinking a chai latte, he waved at Matt and Jess as they entered the shop, the beads round his wrist clattered together. Jess dropped into the chair next to him and stole his drink, Matt sat across from them with his back to the window. 

“Subtle,” said Jess her voice heavy with sarcasm. “Right in the window, practically invisible.”

Danny just sounded amused. “Hey, it’s the benefit of wearing a mask for the superheroing, no-one knows what I look like after I take it off. Back me up Matt?”

“Well I certainly have no idea what you look like,” agreed Matt.

Jess scoffed and Danny chuckled. “Garbett went in the office building opposite about 2 hours ago. I called…” his head turned, a glance at Jess maybe? “A friend. She did a search for me. The offices are rented out to different companies. One of which also owns the warehouse Foggy was taken to, and where Matt encountered that sound generator.”

“A friend?” asked Jess suspiciously. “You mean Trish.”

“She’s at work,” said Danny, his tone placating. “I made her promise to physically stay out of it unless we call. She wants to help Jess.”

Jess stood, “I’m going to check out that warehouse. Maybe I can find a lead there. You two can stay on Garbett.”

“Or I could come with you,” said Matt. 

“If I get caught breaking and entering I have a PI licence and a fancy lawyer. What’s your excuse for being there, Mr Murdock?” pointed out Jess.

“Foggy shouldn’t get any more involved in all this,” said Matt stubbornly.

“Neither should Trish,” snapped Jess. “Guess neither of us get what we want. Mostly because what they decide to do isn’t about us.”

Jess left and Matt stayed where he was. He knew if Foggy were here he’d accuse him of sulking. But, ‘if Foggy were here,’ had been a common thought in Matt’s head this last year. 

**

Luke sat in the corner of Foggy’s office like a giant mountain of a man, reading a book by Dennis Lehane. Quite and unobtrusive and completely impossible to ignore.

“You know you can go if you need to,” said Foggy eventually. “I doubt anyone is going to snatch me from the office.”

Luke looked up from his book. “Yeah but if they did and I’d left? Who do you think would kill me first? Murdock or Jess?”

Foggy groaned. “Actually a fully grown man over here. I can handle myself. Arguably better than either of them.”

Luke just smiled. “Need any help?” he asked instead of answering. Moving over to the chair in front of the desk.

Foggy shook his head. “I’m just going through leases and company paperwork. Garbett is the CEO of a little security company. Which is owned by a bigger company that doesn’t seem to be officially owned by anyone. But Vanessa Marianna is on the board of directors…”

“Who’s she?” asked Luke frowning.

“Fisk’s girlfriend,” said Foggy with a raised eyebrow. “So… that doesn’t look good.”

“No,” agreed Luke.

“But that company owns loads of stuff, all over the city. And it looks like Vanessa was on the board before she even met Fisk,” said Foggy running his hand through his hair in frustration.

“Looks like?” asked Luke.

“Lawyering 101,” said Foggy with a hopeless smile. “People lie, and they usually use the paperwork to do it. But luckily for team us, this is the part I’m best at.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Sure,” said Foggy. “That’s how we work. Murdock is the awesome trial lawyer, wowing everyone with the brilliant speaking and thirst for justice stuff. Then along comes Nelson with the obscure precedent or the paper trail they thought no-one would find… or at least that’s how we _worked_ …” Foggy caught himself. Even now it was too easy to forget. Nelson and Murdock was done.

Luke looked at him for a moment, Foggy felt a little uncomfortable under the gaze. “I’m not just here for Murdock and Jess,” he said eventually. “Your good people Nelson. You got me out of Seagate. I owe you. You sure as hell didn’t need Murdock to do that.”

“Thanks Luke, your good people too,” said Foggy, genuinely touched.

There was a knock at the door. “Mr Nelson? Erm… the patents you asked for?”

“Thanks Neal,” said Foggy, gesturing the young man in, he stood up and took the files from him. Neal ducked his head and left.

“Patents?” asked Luke.

“Yeah,” said Foggy distractedly. “It looks like Garbett’s tiny security company has a suspiciously well-funded research and development department. Might be worth a look to see what they’re working on?”

**

Danny was kind of a sensory oasis. He didn’t seem to favour any over strongly scented products. He smelt mildly like electricity and snow. Matt didn’t know how else to explain it. Plus Danny’s heartbeat and breathing were always calm. The same way that Electra’s and Matt’s own was, a way that spoke of training. Unless he was channelling the Iron Fist, then everything about Danny was turned up to eleven. Buzzing and crackling, disturbing everything around him. But right now, in a café at 1.30 on a Monday afternoon. Danny was a still spot in a bustling city. 

That’s not to say he wasn’t his own kind of annoying.

“How’s the head?” he asked. “After that thing last night?”

“Fine,” said Matt. “It was just unexpected.”

“That machine affected you enough that you walked into a wall. In the middle of a fight,” said Danny. “I don’t think that’s a fair use of the word ‘fine’.”

“Do you have any idea which office Garbett is in?” asked Matt changing the subject.

Danny shook his head then remembered himself and said, “Erm, no. Would you be able to hear him from here, if you have a better idea where he was?”

“Probably not,” said Matt stretching out his senses towards the building anyway. “I don’t know him so I don’t have anything to search for.”

“So would you be able to find me in there?” asked Danny.

“Maybe,” said Matt, concentrating on the building instead of what he was saying to Danny. “But if it was someone I’d known for years then it would be easy.”

“Like Foggy?” asked Danny.

Matt ignored the question. Luckily for him someone came out of the office building. 

“That’s Garbett!” hissed Danny. “Just came out of the building, looks like he’s on his phone.”

“Making dinner plans,” said Matt. “I can’t hear the other side of the conversation.”

Garbett hung up and carried on walking towards the café. The bell on the door rang as he entered. 

“He looked at us,” said Danny. 

“No sign that he recognised us, heartbeat, breathing, all stayed the same,” said Matt. Garbett moved further into the shop and waited at the counter. “I guess the secret identities are safe at least.”

“Good start,” agreed Danny. “Today is starting to look up.”

Garbett ordered a coffee and a Danish to go. His phone rang as he was paying, he took the call, holding up his hand to halt an annoyed looking cashier mid-sentence.

“Garbett,” he barked into the phone.

“How did the test go?” asked the voice on the other side of the line.

“I can’t really talk here, but you were right. They came for the lawyer. Daredevil has already tracked us down. The first prototype worked well on him, but not so much on Iron Fist. Campbell is going over the data.”

“I’ll expect a full report by tomorrow,” the voice on the other end of the line sounded impatient.

“Of course,” said Garbett. He was sweating and his heartbeat picked up. “I’m sure you’ll be happy.”

Matt smirked to himself. Garbett was lying, and seemingly scared of the person on the other end of the call.

“I better be,” said the caller before hanging up.

“I take it from that smirk you heard that conversation?” asked Danny as Garbett paid and left. 

Matt agreed, running Danny through what had been said. All Matt had to do now was get Garbett alone so he could ask him some pointed questions. Find out who the caller was and how all this linked to Fisk.


	4. The Road I Walk Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt is neither trusting or trustworthy. Danny wants to help.

They all met again at Jess’ place. Foggy and Luke walked in to see Jess holding a circuit board up for Danny to see. 

“It’s all I could find at the warehouse Daredevil tried to storm. I think it was part of whatever they used to mess with Matt’s senses,” she said by way of a greeting.

Luke was carrying the patent file under his arm. He lay it out on the desk. “Foggy found the patent application that Garbett’s company filed. It’s based on those high pitched noises that only teenagers are supposed to be able to hear. Somebody called Dr Ashley Campbell is listed as the inventor. It’s an ‘anti-intruder’ device, apparently.”

“Campbell?” asked Danny. “Matt overheard a phone call Garbett was making, presumably to his boss. He said something about Campbell going over some data. He implied that they took Foggy just to piss us all off so we’d go to them and they could test this device.”

“Not just this one,” said Luke grimly. “We found half a dozen different patent applications…”

“Where’s Matt?” asked Foggy suddenly.

“He said he still felt a bit off. I convinced him to go home and get a good night’s sleep,” said Danny smiling reassuringly at Foggy. “I went with him, he’s safe.”

Foggy dropped heavily onto the old couch. “He… just went home. You really brought that?” his voice sounded flat to himself.

Danny frowned. “It was my idea, he didn’t like it but I…”

“Convinced him?” finished Foggy. He dropped his head into his hands and scrubbed at face before looking back up at Danny. “Really?” Foggy tried to hold back the familiar anger at Matt running off on his own, again, to do god knows what. It wasn’t actually Danny’s fault. “He’s gone after Garbett, maybe Campbell. Bet you a million dollars.”

**

Matt knew the others (Foggy) would be mad. But this was his mess, he antagonised Fisk, and Fisk had to be the one behind this. I wasn’t fair to let the others (Foggy) get hurt because of him. He was glad Karen was well out of it, at least for now. 

He’d waited for Garbett at the restaurant he’d overheard him mention when he was on the phone leaving the office earlier. He’d deliberately not told Danny about it. Garbett was meeting a woman, from what could Matt tell from his senses she was younger than Garbett. Barely out of her teens. Garbett was nervous to meet her, he was sweating and his heartbeat was fast. She seemed annoyed, impatient. He met Garbett outside the restaurant. 

“What’s this about Dad?” she asked in place of a ‘hello’.

Garbett made a movement towards her, like he was going in for a hug. She took half a step back and Garbett stopped. “How’s your Mother?” he asked instead.

“You’re not allowed to ask that,” said the girl coldly. 

“Shall we go inside?” asked Garbett. The girl refused his arm and walked in in front of him. Garbett sighed heavily as he followed her in. 

Once they were inside Matt couldn’t discern their conversation over the background noise. He could just track about where they were in the building from his perch across the street. They stayed for a little over and hour and a half. They left in silence, standing on the street, waiting for a car Matt guessed. A sleek black car pulled up and Garbett opened the rear door. 

“I could give you a lift?” he asked, voice hopeful but Matt didn’t think he expected the girl to accept.

“My cab will be here soon, I’ll be fine,” she said curtly.

“Hannah,” said Garbett, something in his voice was pleading.

“One dinner, once a month, in return for my tuition fees. That’s what we agreed,” stated Hannah. “I’ll see you next month.”

Garbett wanted to say something else. He held his breath and his heart skipped. But he just nodded and climbed into the car. “Take me to the lab. Has the package arrived?” he asked the driver.

“She’s on route, Sir,” replied the driver.

Matt raced across the rooftops following the car. Thankful that Garbett asked for the radio to be on. He followed Taylor Swift, and then Adele to a non-descript building just before the docks. Garbett went in the driver pulled the car away. Matt tracked Garbett’s heartbeat up to the top floor. He smiled sharply. Roof access, suited him just fine. He made his way over to the building. He couched in shadow, his hand splayed out on the surface of the roof in front of him. He reached out with his senses. Garbett was underneath him to the left, talking with another person. A woman. 

“You’re late,” said the woman. “The Directors will not be pleased with delays.”

“It was personal,” said Garbett gruffly. “They will be even less pleased with failure. The anti-Daredevil measure was a lot less effective than you promised.”

“The footage of Daredevil I had access to indicated he had to be using senses other than merely sight to anticipate his opponent’s movements. I theorised enhanced hearing was most likely. The new data, however, suggests more of a combination of all five senses. It is fascinating.”

There were three, no four other heartbeats. And… one familiar one…

“Let me go!” shouted Trish Walker. Two of the other heartbeats were holding her back. “You won’t get away with this!”

“Lock her in the test chamber,” said the woman by Garbett. She sounded bored. “When Jones comes looking for her we’ll start the test.”

Trish screamed and struggled. There was a roof access door further along the roof. A tell-tale buzz indicated that it was alarmed, maybe booby trapped. Matt was pretty sure he didn’t want to set off a trap meant for Jess, he was much less durable.

“Can I help?” asked a voice behind him. Iron Fist, Matt had been concentrating so hard on the floor below he’d missed Danny’s approach. “I mean, you went pretty far to ditch me. But luckily you didn’t fool Foggy.”

“Where is he?” asked Matt. Suddenly irrationally scared that Foggy had come with Danny.

“Safe,” said Danny kindly. “If I can trust _him_ to stay where he told me he’d be.”

Matt didn’t have time to apologise. “Garbett and a woman, four others. They have Trish.”

“Trish? Or…?” asked Danny.

“Trish,” said Matt firmly. “They are after Jess, not Hellcat.”

“Shit,” said Danny under his breath, he reached into a pocket.

“What are you doing?” asked Matt.

“Texting Jess and Luke,” said Danny, as if it were obvious. “We all took one of the addresses Foggy found for Garbett and came looking for you.”

Matt winced. “Foggy should worry less.” 

“You do realise he’s not the only one who was worried right?” asked Danny, surprise in his tone. “We all care, even if Jess doesn’t like to say it.”

“We can’t wait for them,” said Matt cutting him off. “We need to get Trish out.”

Danny put his phone back in the pocket. “They’re on their way. Shall I knock?”

Matt directed Danny to an area where there was no-one below them. Danny punched straight through the roof. They jumped down and Matt had the pleasure of hearing Garbett’s heart race and his breath come faster in panic and fear. 

“Neither one of them is Jones!” he shouted.

The woman was startled but not afraid. “Hmm, this is the second time Daredevil has turned up with another. Interesting, his psychological profile indicated he would very resistant to teamwork. I shall have to update.”

“Lady, you have no idea,” murmured Danny under his breath. 

“Don’t just stand there!” Garbett shouted to his minions. “Get them.” 

The four standard thugs came closer and Garbett ran for the door. The woman calmly made some notes on her clipboard. One of the thugs smelt of blood, his nose has been recently broken, another was limping on his left leg, damage to his knee. And they were all moving like they were pretty badly bruised. Matt smirked, Trish had not been taken without a fight. Danny punched the one with the broken nose right in the face. Matt kicked another in his damaged knee, taking some satisfaction in the crack of bone and cartilage. They made quick work of all four men, and soon they were unconscious. Matt felt more than heard the growl in his throat as he approached the woman. 

She turned and ran into the next room, Danny and Matt followed. Trish was in there, muffled, like she was behind glass, or thick plastic. The door closed automatically behind them with a hiss of compressed air. Trish banged on the wall between them. She was shouting but it sounded like it was coming from miles away. Bad soundproofing. Matt doubted Danny could hear her, but his heartrate jumped in recognition. He must be able to see her.

Something disturbed the air in front of Matt, slamming down in front of him. Some kind of security wall. Didn’t smell like metal, plastic then, the same as Trish was behind no doubt.

“Do you think this will keep you safe?” asked Danny, sounding more dangerous than Matt had ever heard him sound before.

“Yes, actually,” said the woman. “It was designed to contain Jones and Cage. I doubt the two of you will trouble it much. “I wonder if you would answer a few questions?”

“Who are you?” asked Matt.

“Dr Campbell, I presume,” snarled Danny. “She designs anti-intruder systems for Garbett.”

“Oh, very clever!” said Campbell sounding impressed. “Research capabilities, of course Jones is an investigator, and Nelson helps? He would be able to access a lot of legal documents. Tell me, do you consult with him as a matter of course or is he involved simply because we involved him? I must say you appear far more organised than I gave you credit for. My apologies.”

“Mr Nelson is not a part of this,” said Matt. Too quickly, too sharply. His heartbeat would give him away easily if Campbell could hear it.

Campbell made a note on her clipboard. Matt could hear the scratch of the pen. He wanted to tear it out of her hands. “I don’t work for Garbett,” she continued. “A rather odious little man, but his company makes a good screen to hide behind. My… investors… are a… diverse… group. Looking for ways to protect their assets from people such as yourself. This next measure is designed for Jones but I don’t see how extra data is ever a bad thing…”

She moved away from the barrier, Matt heard a soft beep and a hiss, displacement of air and a sickly sweet smell and a gas was released from the ceiling. The wall between them and Trish slid up. She ran over to them.

“Gas!” said Danny, a bit redundantly.

“I got that,” said Matt.

“It should cause visual hallucinations, and a lack of emotional control,” said Campbell. “I admit it is a little unrefined.”

“You think lack of emotional control was a good idea on Jess?” said Trish. “Daredevil, there are not really demons coming out the walls, right?”

“No,” said Matt flatly. “Concentrate, no smell, no sound, not real.” Matt didn’t understand what he was experiencing. Lights, colours, shapes. His brain trying to make sense of the input from the drug, using childhood memories to do it. His Dad’s face was very clear for a moment before Matt pushed it out of his mind. Focused on Danny heartbeat. Trish. Her heartbeat was erratic like Danny’s, like Matt’s. 

“Interesting,” said Campbell. The scratch of pen on paper just as irritating as before. She leant closer to the barrier. “Your reliance of visual input is even less than I had theorised….”

Danny smashed his fist into the barrier just in front of Campbell’s face. She took an instinctive step back. Danny hit the same place again. Matt heard the plastic crack, gas escaping through the tiny hole. Now at last Campbell seemed scared, backing away. 

“Tell me again this isn’t real,” said Danny, he sounded scared. 

“What can you smell, what can you hear?” asked Matt. “Don’t trust what you can see, it’s not real. There’s only you and me in here.”

Danny hit the barrier again. The crack was bigger, and Campbell ran. Matt could feel the drug working through his system he felt it trying to shut his mind down. Danny slumped against the broken barrier, and slid to the floor. Trish curled up on the floor, conscious because Matt could hear sobbing. He heard voices, Jess, and Luke. Hands pulled him upright, he couldn’t remember falling down. Then nothing. He passed out.


	5. The Road Goes Ever On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Argh no.... feelings!

Matt woke to the feel of Claire’s hand on his neck, taking his pulse. 

“It’s okay, you’re at Trish’s apartment. You’ve been passed out for about 45 minutes. How do you feel?” she said clearly and slowly.

“I’m okay,” said Matt on reflex. He forced himself to sit up. Claire, god bless her sat back and let him. Luke was stood in the doorway. He took a step forward like he wanted to help. Claire shook her head at him and he stopped.

“Okay, let’s try that again, how are you?” repeated Claire, amusement in her tone.

Matt managed to get upright. “Groggy, and… angry, really angry. Too angry.”

Claire nodded. “That’s the drug, you might find you have mood swings until that crap works its way out of your system. I don’t know how long that will be. I’m guessing a hospital is out of the question?”

Matt was suddenly gripped by a wave of fear. “Garbett and Campbell, they got away. Where’s Foggy?”

“He’s waiting at your place,” rumbled Luke. “The lab we found you in is destroyed.” 

“Good,” said Matt darkly. He went to stand, which apparently was where Claire drew the line.

“No,” she said pushing him down gently, hands on his shoulders. “You are way too disorientated to go out there now. Not to mention the mood swings. What are you doing to do if you find them?”

Kill them, kill them was Matt’s first thought. They put his friends in danger, treated them like lab rats. He wanted to kill them, and that was here and now. Without them right in front of him. He took a deep breath, and then another.

“We’ll get them,” promised Luke. “But you need to sleep get this crap outta you. We do this on a clear head.”

“I want to go home,” said Matt. He made his voice small, tried not to let them see the anger. 

“You need to sleep, I can’t give you any pain killers, not that you’d take them anyway. You gonna let Luke take you home.”

“I’ll be okay,” said Matt.

“I’ll take him,” said Jess from somewhere behind Luke. 

“I’ll be fine,” said Matt through gritted teeth. “What about Trish?”

“She’d sleeping,” said Jess. “I’ll be back before she wakes up. Luke will keep her safe. But I wanna make sure Nelson is safe with you.”

A fresh wave of anger hit Matt. “I wouldn’t hurt Foggy.”

“You’re angry,” stated Jess. “And don’t try to tell me your ex doesn’t make that worse.” Matt opened his mouth to speak but Jess just carried on. “Whatever, I wasn’t asking permission Murdock. Let’s go.”

**

Foggy was curled up on Matt’s sofa, half dozing, half watching the play of colours from the billboard danced over the various surfaces in the apartment. The lightbulb had burnt out and Matt must not have got around to replacing it. He was startled by the sound of the key in the door. He scrambled off the sofa.

“Nelson,” called Jess. 

“In here,” answered Foggy. They came round the corner, Matt walking under his own steam, so there was that. Wearing borrowed sweatpants and a sweater that was slightly too big. Foggy didn’t know what to do. A year ago he would have gone over, maybe even hugged him. Now it seemed like there was a million miles between them. 

“Foggy,” said Matt. His expression broke Foggy’s heart. He was angry and hurting, he looked like he did in college. After Elektra left.

“He’s still feeling the effects of the drug,” said Jess. “Mood swings. With him, it’s mostly anger. You don’t have to stay here. You can leave with me if you want.”

Matt’s fists were clenched at his side, but even without that Foggy would have known. Matt gets angry, it’s always his first reaction. But there is no-one in the world better at controlling it than Matt. “I’m staying,” said Foggy. His voice was steady but he doubted his heart was from the look on Matt’s face. It passed quickly.

“If you’re sure,” said Jones. “If it changes call, one of us will come get you. I have to get back to Trish. Murdock, just remember that you love him, yeah? I’m going to come bac and check on you both in a few hours. Murdock, you should sleep.” Jess left and Matt and Foggy were staring at each other.

“It’s like she thinks you’re going to punch me or something,” said Foggy, trying to break the mood.

“I would never do that,” said Matt. Too sincere, too intense. Matt Murdock dialled up to 11.

“No,” agreed Foggy. “That’s not how you and me fight. Wanna fight me?”

“Yes,” said Matt, shaking his head. “No. I don’t know.”

“Are you hurt?” asked Foggy, taking a step forward.

“I’m not made of glass,” snapped Matt. “I’m not going to shatter under a little pressure.”

“Neither am I,” said Foggy. He stood a little taller.

“You left,” said Matt voice harsh and full of heat. “You said you’d try, but you left.”

“You didn’t give me a choice,” replied Foggy, trying to keep the emotion out of his own voice.

“I did, I _asked_ ,” insisted Matt.

“You gave me a choice you knew I wouldn’t take, don’t pretend I don’t know your tricks, Murdock,” countered Foggy. His resolve to stay calm weakening. Matt was always capable of making him feel more than he wanted to. 

“You left, but you were still there. Every time I turned my head,” said Matt the anger was still there but now Matt seemed lost.

Foggy took another step forward. “Are you mad at me because I left, or because I didn’t.”

Matt laughed and it was like broken glass. “You never did what I thought you were going to do. I should be used to it by now.”

“The others let me help,” said Foggy carefully. “You pushed me out, kept me in the dark. I can’t stand by, watch you hurt yourself, and do nothing. But there’s nothing I can do if you don’t tell me what’s going on.” He reached for Matt’s arm but Matt pulled back.

“You don’t need to be involved in all this! You’re _good_ , you have friends, a job, a life. What right did I ever have to drag you down with me?” said Matt the anger and the heat back and it made Foggy see red.

“I need you!” Foggy shouted back. “You have no idea, no idea how much I need - needed you. Do you really think I would have got anywhere without you. You push me and challenge me. You make me be the best I can be. Everyone else, _everyone else_ , I have to be so careful. Make sure they get the version of me that they want. Jones wants a drinking buddy, but she needs someone to reign her in. Karen needs a big brother, Danny needs a friend, Marci needs an equal to fight, Jerri needs me to be a lawyer. You were the only one who I was ever just myself with. And stupid me, I thought you were just yourself with me too. Turns out I was wrong, that there were whole parts of you I never touched. And you are never, never ever, going to let me close to.” Foggy realised he was shouting, his eyes burned like he was crying but no tears fell. He took a deep breath. “I don’t even know if I could handle it if you did. But I wanted, I wanted… something I couldn’t have. Clearly.” 

Matt grabbed him then. “I can’t… Foggy I can’t. I don’t… I feel weird.” Matt stumbled against Foggy. He barely managed to keep them both upright.

“Matt! Buddy, you okay?” Matt nodded. 

“I think I need to sit down,” he said.

“Bed,” said Foggy firmly. “Sleep. Please Matt, just this once. Trust me.”

Matt nodded and let Foggy lead him to the bedroom. 

**  
When Matt woke the second time he thought he was alone for a split second. But then he made out Foggy’s heartbeat, the smell of his shampoo, the sound of him tapping the keys on his laptop. He was sat in the corner on the room, his laptop on his knees.

“Foggy?” asked Matt. Not sure himself what he was asking. You stayed? Are you staying? Why?

“Hey,” said Foggy softly, setting the laptop on the floor out of the way. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” said Matt, smiling in Foggy’s direction. “My head feels clearer. Thank you, for watching me.”

“Eh,” shrugged Foggy, the whisper of his hair against his raised shoulder. “Your easy on the eye.” A joke, a way to let them both out of the previous conversation.

“How long did I sleep?” asked Matt.

“About five hours,” answered Foggy. He stood to leave. “Your probably hungry, we should get you some food.”

“Don’t go,” said Matt suddenly. “Please Foggy, stay with me. Just… just for a bit.”

“Until the next time there’s something you won’t tell me,” said Foggy, it was quiet, like he didn’t really mean for it to come out.

“I want to keep you safe,” replied Matt. Just as quietly.

“How many times, Matt?” said Foggy, his whole being slumped like he was beyond tired. “We do this dance every time. But basically you just don’t trust me. Or anyone.”

“I do trust you,” said Matt close to tears. Maybe the drug wasn’t quite as gone as he hoped. (Maybe it was easier to blame it than admit to feeling this.)

Foggy seemed like maybe he was fighting back tears of his own. “You don’t. Daredevil, Elektra, those were the big things, things I couldn’t ignore. But now? Now when I look back at all the time I’ve known you, there’s a thousand little things, little lies to avoid telling me anything about yourself. You know everything about me, the good, the bad, all of it. This last year I still wanted to tell you… God, every little thing. I nearly called you so many times because I don’t work properly without you.”

“I don’t work properly without you either,” implored Matt. “I just… people leave, Foggy. They don’t always mean to but they do. If I… if you were as much a part of my life as I want you to be, I’d never recover when you left. It was nearly impossible this time. If I had all of you, even for a second. I’d never be able to live without you. So I had to…” Matt trailed off.

“Had to what, Matty?” asked Foggy softly. “Always keep me at arms length? How’s that working out? Did it stop you, either of us, from being hurt?”

Matt dropped is head, his shoulders came up, trying to hide inside himself. Foggy was always braver, he risked a couple of steps closer to the bed. 

“Please Matt, I can’t promise I’ll be here forever. But you can have all of me, you always could. Just please don’t take something you can’t give me back…”

Matt grabbed Foggy’s shirt and pulled him down, cutting off Foggy’s words with Matt’s lips on his, Matt’s hands tangled in Foggy’s shirt. After a second of shock Foggy kissed back for all he was worth. His own hands clutching Matt’s arms. Matt pulled him onto the bed. Only then did he break the kiss, forehead pressed against Foggy’s his breath heavy between them.

Foggy didn’t fight him, he lay there, letting Matt catch his thoughts.

“I want this,” whispered Matt, his low voice caught in Foggy’s chest. Making Foggy feel like a fish on a line, waiting to be reeled in. “I want you, I always wanted you. But I’d hurt you…”

“Already hurt me,” Foggy whispered back, but Matt carried on like he hadn’t spoken.

“I’d break you.”

“Already broke me. I’m still here.”

“Then you’d leave me and I wouldn’t survive. I asked Stick for too much and he left. I gave Electra too much of me and she left. My _Dad_. Better not to have you at all, but I couldn’t leave you, wasn’t strong enough.”

“So you made me leave instead?” asked Foggy.

“Didn’t mean too,” said Matt hollowly. “I didn’t know that was what I was doing, until it was done. And you were gone, and Stick was gone _again_ , and Karen was going, and Electra was dead, and I was alone.”

Foggy kissed Matt this time, softer than before, coaxing. Trying to let Matt know he was here, and he loved him. Matt relaxed a little, leaning into Foggy and Foggy wound his arms around Matt. 

“But you didn’t go,” said Matt pulling back slightly. “You were still there, for everybody but me.”

“Leaving you wasn’t what I wanted, it was never what I wanted,” said Foggy. 

“I don’t know what to do,” admitted Matt.

“Stop only telling me the things you think I want to hear,” said Foggy quietly. “Stop trying to protect me from you. Protect yourself a little more. I’m scared of you leaving me too.”

“I can try,” said Matt. “But what if I can’t? What if we just do this all over again?”

“With you is better than without,” whispered Foggy. “I don’t know what we’re doing either but I know that.”

“You better not be having sex in there!” shouted Jones through the door.

“Oh good, she’s back,” Foggy whispered into the tiny space between them. He raised his voice. “We’re _law_ partners, Jones!”

“Right,” Jones shouted back, clearly disbelieving.

Matt pressed in close and kissed Foggy’s neck, he could feel the laughter trapped in his throat. Foggy shouted back to Jess. “We’re debating Thurgood Marshall.”

“Yeah, and I’m going for a drink!” shouted Jones. “Trish and Danny are okay by the way.”

There was the sound of the door opening and closing. “She’s gone,” Matt whispered against Foggy’s neck. “Just us.”

“Nelson and Murdock,” Foggy murmured back.


	6. Epilogue – six months later

Everything didn’t just magically get better. There was still a long way to go.

Foggy still didn’t like Matt throwing himself at harm’s way.

Matt’s first instinct was still to try to deal with all the problems of the world on his own.

Jess still drank too much.

Trish still wanted to be Hellcat.

Luke and Claire broke up.

Karen came back with darker eyes and a broken heart.

Garbett and Campbell disappeared, without a trace. Not even Jess could find them.

But… maybe, just maybe, there was the possibility of it all working out.


End file.
